Same sex friendships while dating

But even if your spouse does a better job meeting these needs, a friend can make enough Love Bank deposits by meeting these need for you that you may wake up one morning in love with that person.

And if that happens your judgment will be severely damaged.

Even if a couple is in enthusiastic agreement, I recommend that a friendship with someone who was a former lover should be ended.

Also, a friendship with someone who you feel might actually make enough deposits to breach the romantic love threshold should be ended. To summarize my criterion for off-limits acquaintances of the opposite sex: Any friend of the opposite sex that meets your need for affection (expressions of care and concern), intimate conversation (conversation about personal problems being faced, and topics of personal interest), recreational companionship (spending time together enjoying common recreational activities), honesty and openness (revealing personal feelings, past history, present activities, and plans for the future), physical attractiveness, or admiration (expressions of respect, value, and appreciation).

But when an opposite-sex friend meets the most important emotional needs of affection (expressions of care and concern), intimate conversation (conversation about personal problems being faced, and topics of personal interest), recreational companionship (spending time together enjoying common recreational activities), honesty and openness (revealing personal feelings, past history, present activities, and plans for the future), physical attractiveness, or admiration (expressions of respect, value, and appreciation), romantic love is almost sure to follow.

It's terribly damaging to the couple's children, and even to members of the extended family.

It's personal in the sense that personal information is revealed, especially problems faced in life, along with a willingness to help if needed.

And it's bilateral in the sense that both people share information with each other and prove that they have what it takes to help each other.

And it also has devastating economic consequences for most couples that have experienced an affair.

Yet, I estimate that over sixty percent of all couples will suffer through an affair at some point in their marriage.

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